It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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