I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
