just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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