when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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