Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
