After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
