just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
