he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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