Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
