Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
