I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
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