i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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