Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
