How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
