is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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