Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
