Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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