If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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