She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
BRING THE BAGELS
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
