Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Randomize
