Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize