i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
