actually, I'm a sock model
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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