omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
