white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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