You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
