I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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