im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize