I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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