ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize