have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
