Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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