And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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