My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
And my parents said I crawled through the house
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
