is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
