so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
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