dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
