Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
That's when you crack a 10am beer
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
