How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
