I'm lost and stupid without you.
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
so much tequila, so little girl.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize