I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
