Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
