He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
