then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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