i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
