Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Randomize
