im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
