The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
