my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize
