We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
