there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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