More tranny stories later!
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
