oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
